| Body Language |
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| How To Read Body Language |
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How to Read Body Language.
Interpreting the body language signals that people send out is a very useful and fun social skill. Some can read it naturally and some are notoriously oblivious. By using some focused attention on these signals you can learn to read body language, and with enough practice it’ll become second nature. Here are some ways you can use this to evaluate others.
1. Notice how close someone is to you.
The closer they are to you, the warmer their opinions are of you. The farther away that they are, the less they actually care of the situation or person. If you move a little closer to them and they move slightly further away then that means they don’t want your interaction to be any more personal than it already is. If they do not move further away, then they are receptive. If they happen to respond by getting even closer to you, then they probably really like you or are very comfortable around/by you. Keep in mind that personal space should always be respected.
2. Watch their head position.
When someone tilts their head this is a potential sign of sympathy. If a person smiles while tilting their head, they are being playful and maybe even flirting. Lowering their head indicates a reason to hide something. Notice if someone lowers their head. If this happens when he is complimented, he may be shy, ashamed, timid, keeping distance from the other person, in disbelief, or thinking to himself or herself. If it is after an explanation, then they may be unsure if what they said was correct. Although some cultures see this as a sign of respect. If they cock their head to one side it means that they are confused or challenging you, depending on eye, eyebrow, and mouth gestures. Watch how a dog slightly cocks its head when you make a funny noise.
3. Look into their eyes.
Keep in mind that people who look to the sides a lot are nervous, lying, or distracted. However, if a person happens to look away from the speaker, it very well could be a comfort display or indicate submissiveness. Looking askance generally means that person is distrustful or unconvinced. If someone looks down at the floor a lot then they are probably shy or timid. There are some cultures that consider looking at someone in the eyes is a sign of disrespect, so this could explain why someone is avoiding eye contact with you. Dilated pupils mean that the person is interested. Keep in mind that many drugs cause pupils to dilate, including alcohol, cocaine, amphetamines, MDMA, LSD and others. So don’t mistake having a few drinks for attraction. Also, some people have permanently dilated pupils (a condition known as mydriasis).
4. Notice if they’re mirroring you.
Mirroring is common gesture. When someone mirrors, or mimics your appearance, this is a very genuine sign that they are interested in you and trying to establish rapport with you. Try changing your body position here and there and if you find that they change theirs similarly, they are mirroring.
5. Check their arms.
People with crossed arms are generally closing themselves to social influence. Even though some people just cross their arms as a habit, it may indicate that the person is (slightly) reserved, uncomfortable with their weight (therefore trying to hide it), or just trying to hide something on their shirt. If their arms happen to be crossed while their feet are shoulder width or wider apart, this is a position of toughness or authority. If someone is resting their arms behind their neck or head, they are open to what is being discussed or just laid back in general. If they have their hands on their hips, they might be waiting or impatient.
6. Be aware of nervous gestures.
If someone brushes their hair back with their fingers, this could be preening, a common gesture if the person likes you, or their thoughts about something are conflicting with yours although they might not voice this. If you happen to see raised eyebrows during this time, you can be pretty sure that they disagree with you. Notice if a person that wears glasses is constantly pushing them up onto their nose again, with a slight frown, that may also indicate they disagree with what you are saying. Look to make sure they push up their glasses with an intent and not just casually adjusting them. Notice if they push on the rim with two fingers, or an extra motion of wiggling the side of their glasses. A frown or raised eyebrows should tip you off. Lowered eyebrows and squinted eyes shows an attempt at understanding what is being said or going on. It’s normally skeptical. This is, however, presuming they are not trying to observe something that’s far away.
7. Watch their feet.
Generally, a fast tapping, shifting of weight, laughing, or movement of the foot will most often mean that the person is impatient, excited, nervous, scared, or intimidated. Although you should bear in mind that some people with ADHD will constantly jiggle their legs. This doesn’t mean anything, it’s entirely subconscious and, while eccentric, it can’t be stopped. If a person is sitting, feet crossed at the ankles means they’re generally at ease. If a person that is standing seems to always keep their feet very close together, it probably means they are trying to be “proper” in some way. Take note that if they purposely touch their feet to yours, they are flirting!
Tips.
- It’s not difficult to spot a confident person; they will make prolonged eye contact and have a strong posture. Extended eye contact can also be found in lovers’ eyes.
- If a person talks real fast and mumbles or is not clear on what they are saying they are lying (trying to stall for time) or not telling the full truth (being vague).
- Be sure not to isolate yourself by constantly examining body language when interacting with people. Otherwise, there is really no reason to gain a social upper hand anyway. This is called paralysis by analysis.
- Watch their face, it will usually give off a quick involuntary and sometimes subconscious twitch when something happens that irritates, excites, or amuses them.
- Observing in context is the key to understanding body language. Remember that each person has their own unique body language called baseline behaviors. When observing others, be subtle about it. Pay close attention to changes in body language rather than the body language itself.
